What does self care through food and eating look like?
Food and eating is fundamental for survival, yet so many of us develop a really complicated relationship with both. The most basic needs can become neglected, ignored and / or abused.
We somehow forget how to nourish and care for ourselves, in the most basic way – with food. Or perhaps we are trained from a young age that our hungers don’t matter?
When we think about selfcare we may think about massages, hot baths and fancy retreats. We may forget about the importance to care for ourselves, as well as our bodies in a kind compassionate way, often because we get too busy caring for everybody else’s needs!
We simply cannot pour from an empty cup. Even though many of us like to think so…
Selfcare, food and eating
What does it look like when I take care of myself in the most nourishing way possible, using food?
This is where bringing some mindfulness to the table can be super helpful. By cultivating both awareness, as well as self compassion, I can figure out how to support and serve my body with what it needs, when it needs it.
We may straightway think that nourish ourselves with food mean making the most nutritious choices possible. And yes, it may be so. But before we even decide what to eat, we need to honour our need TO eat.
” Honouring our physical hunger with food, is telling ourselves in real time, that we are worthy of care”
– Judith Matz
First of all (re)learning to recognise the subtle cues of hunger and then HONOUR them (i.e eat!) is important. Even vital! Just like making susre we get adequate sleep and water, we need to feed our bodies if we want them to function well. Or perhaps function at all…
The second thing is to ask ourselves what we are hungry for? If we are physically hungry, what specific food am I hungry for?
This is where it can get complicated. We may have lot of external rules for what we “should” be wanting and what foods are good for us. Or we may fear that if we let ourselves have exactly what we want we will be living on bars of chocolate and crisps forever.
It is at exactly this point where we need to build strong trust as well as deep listening, so that we can actually hear what it is our BODY wants. Not necessarily what the mind is craving…
Mindful eating, is not restrictive (because restriction only backfires!) yet it is not really about eating whatever we want, whenever we want, either.
Mindful eating is to respectfully listen to our bodies for what it needs and then honour that need. This takes time and practice.
Food is fundamental nourishment for our physical body and our survival, so when we feed our bodies in ways that are both nourishing and satisfying we are taking care of ourselves. Self care through food.
So how do you know what (food) choices to make ?
By trying to make a food choice that is both nutritious and satisfying will also most likely mean that it will definitely be nourishing too.
Being mindful not only give us the opportunity to listen to the signals of hunger, fullness & satiety. It also gives us the chance to be present and make a choice to have what we are hungry for.
It’s all too easy to ignore these subtle signals from our body, when we are stressed.
We eat foods that are easy to grab on the go, struggling to carve out time to prepare meal.
We eat fast, not chewing well and perhaps not tasting much either.
We eat too much or not enough. Neither which serves our body in the way it deserves.
Of course, it is not always possible to make the right match for what you desire and what your body is calling for each and every time. Sometimes we are more mindful than others. Sometimes we don’t have to hand what we want or need, sometimes we let ourselves get ravenous making it hard to to make an informed choice, and other times we eat until we feel uncomfortably full.
Please remember that eating is not about perfection. Context matters, accessibility matter and self compassion matters too, especially if you are beating yourself up for a “less than perfect choice”.
When the negative voice pops up we need to be kind and caring towards ourselves, rather than letting this inner mean voice take over, and getting stuck beating ourselves up. Instead we can with kindness recognise that perhaps this particular choice at this particular moment, wasn’t the wisest move. And then move on.
This is how we create freedom and choice, and freedom with food.
How are you going to nourish yourself with some self care through food this week?
Do you long to let go of obsession around food, eating and weight? Would you like to feel freedom and peace around meals and beyond, but need some help and support to get there?
It would be an honour to walk with you on this path. Book HERE to set up a free 30 min consultation to explore how this may be possible for you too.
(This post was originally written in 2017 and have been updated for clarity)
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